Week 3 - Greg + Ben A-C
I met Ben at West Didsbury tram stop and we travelled to Lucky Cat in town together. I misread the sign outside the restaurant and was initially under the misapprehension that Gordon Ramsey had been knighted. Thankfully this isn’t so.
Ben and I started our conversation on the tram into town and I’ve decided to document some bon mots here. I’m not sure whether this is technically allowed, but my blog, my rules.
I type this onboard a flight to Chambéry for a week’s skiing. Yes, I’m one for those. Sorry. Ben’s brother Jack and his fiancée (one of my least favourite words) Catherine are meeting us in France, having driven from the UK. Jack drives everywhere and has accompanied several billionaires on vintage car rallies. Apparently the super wealthy are too important to take the wheel for extended periods, perhaps for tax reasons.
Ben is the husband of my friend Tom, who I have known for more years than I care to calculate, and Ben and I have now become good friends. I first met Tom at the Astoria on Charing Cross Road, but that’s a story for another day.
I don’t really drink anymore, but we both decided to start the meal with a cocktail. Mine was a fancy version of an espresso martini (a drink allegedly invented for Kate Moss) and was fine. Ben’s was a fancy (everything at Fortunate Feline is fancy) martini which was far more agreeable. I will try not to bore you with my quasi-sobriety, but feel it bears a mention. I had previously attempted to moderate my (although not overly excessive) drinking a few times, but found the only way to restrict myself to one or two drinks per social occasion was to give up entirely and then start again. I now average a couple of drinks a week and only then decent booze, rather than just chucking back cheap plonk as I was previously wont to do.
Ben mentioned David Nutt, who was the short-lived drug czar in Tony Blair’s government before he was unceremoniously fired for suggesting that horse riding is more dangerous than taking ecstasy, which it is. Tact wasn’t his strong point. Nor is it mine. He has since gone on to invent a non-alcoholic alternative to booze that is designed to hit the same receptors in the brain as a glass of Fernet Branca. Ben has some at home and isn’t sure whether it meets its objectives. There is a label on the bottle recommending you don’t drive, but that might just be marketing.
We inevitably veered onto the subject of Traitors and I was proud of myself for not revealing any spoilers. What surprised me most about our conversation was that Ben isn’t a Claudia Winkleman fan. Enough said.
For some reason I can’t recall, we discussed customer service and I subjected Ben to a couple of stories on the subject. The first involved a petrol station owner somewhere in the US, let’s say Albuquerque. The owners of the chain, let’s call them Chevron, couldn’t understand why this outlet sold more petrol than others in the area. Here’s why; it was a full service station and each time a new customer arrived, he would ask their name and attach it to the inside of the fuel door. This meant the next time the customers returned he could refer to them by name.
The other example is of a hotel that applies a similar principle. As you arrive the porter takes your luggage and asks if you’ve been to the hotel before. They then place your cases either parallel or perpendicular to the front desk depending on your answer, and the front desk staff know whether to greet you with a “Welcome” or a “Lovely to see you again”. Low tech but effective and quite clever.
Our conversation moved onto driven, highly successful people and whether they’re ever really happy. We concluded probably not. Luckily I’m not one of them so I’ve no excuse not to be full of bonhomie at all times. We also discussed spin classes and how difficult it is to find a decent instructor (Ben still remembers the name of his from a class he attended in the mid noughties), our feelings on the current government and their squandered opportunity to effect change while they still have a massive majority and how nice Ben’s shirt was.
We ordered the following, all of which was very nice but the egg fried rice (the waiter’s recommendation) was a particular favourite:
Lobster summer roll
Hiramasa roll
Monkfish tempura
Bonito fried duck leg bao
Egg fried rice
Crispy pork & papaya
We rounded off the meal with a final cocktail each, the ingredients of which for mine were selected by the throw of three dice, and then caught the tram home together.
Third time lucky (cat). Thanks Ben!
